"Happiness? A good cigar, a good meal, a good cigar and a good woman - or a bad woman; it depends on how much happiness you can handle."
 George Burns

"Sometimes you eat the bear, and sometimes the bear, well, he eats you." The Stranger

"Judge Smails: You know, you should play with Dr. Beeper and myself. I mean, he's been club champion for three years running and I'm no slouch myself.

"You may run like Mays, but you hit like !@#$." ~Lou Brown in Major League

"Looks like you have El Hosel, the laterals—you know, the S-word" ~ Romeo in Tin Cup