"I drink a great deal. I sleep a little, and I smoke cigar after cigar. That is why I am in two-hundred-percent form."
-- Winston Churchill

"It has been my experience that folks who have no vices, have very few virtues."
-- Abraham Lincoln

"I call this turf 'n' turf. It's a 16 oz T-bone and a 24 oz porterhouse. Also, whiskey and a cigar. I am going to consume all of this at the same time because I am a free American."
-- Ron Swanson

Guru Master of the Minions

Alcohol, Tobacco, & Firearms should be a convenience store, not a department of our government!

Gunga galunga ... gunga, gunga-lagunga." - Carl Spackler

Education is important, cigars are importanter!

I like long walks, especially when they're taken by people who annoy me