Bad Dad Jokes

Started by gitfiddl, 07/03/2020 03:30 PM

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gitfiddl

How does the Man in the Moon cut his hair?


Eclipse it!

 :lmao:


Feel free to add your own!
Self-appointed Guru of Pass Container Sizing,  All Things Midgetly Stripperish, and general "Stirrer of the Puddin'".

ntanner

#1
Wow Dave. If your gonna show up out of nowhere and drop crappy jokes we are gonna start calling you the Guru of dead threads. :moon:  Welcome back old man :biggrin:
I am not concerned about what you think as I can tell you don't do it often.

I used to be a people person, but then people ruined that for me.

Every loaf of bread is a tragic story of a group of grains that could have become beer but didn't.

amigodecigars

A man  was telling his son, 'I just bought a new hearing aid. It cost me four thousand dollars, but it's state of the art. It's perfect.'

  'Really,' answered the neighbor. 'What kind is it?'     'Twelve thirty.'
"There are plenty of good five-cent cigars in the country. The trouble is they cost a quarter. What this country needs is a good five-cent nickel."  Franklin Pierce Adams

StogieDad

My daughter's favorite once for years has been:  Where do bees stop to go to the bathroom?


The BP station....:biggrin:
"I drink a great deal. I sleep a little, and I smoke cigar after cigar. That is why I am in two-hundred-percent form."
-- Winston Churchill

"It has been my experience that folks who have no vices, have very few virtues."
-- Abraham Lincoln

"I call this turf 'n' turf. It's a 16 oz T-bone and a 24 oz porterhouse. Also, whiskey and a cigar. I am going to consume all of this at the same time because I am a free American."
-- Ron Swanson


   
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